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Being A BoyMom

February 24, 2019

If you saw me 20 years ago, you NEVER would have imagined I’d be the one to end up with three sons. I was (and still am!) introverted, un-athletic, shy — an “indoor girl” who preferred reading a book to going outdoors.

Fast forward to the present and, yes, I am now a boymom — and as you might have guessed, it’s been a bit of a learning curve. When we found out we were pregnant with our first baby in 2010, my husband & I went in for our highly-anticipated ultrasound and I was practically already choosing baby names for our sweet little girl. Why WOULDN’T it be a girl?! I’m a girl, I’m very into girly stuff, I’m the firstborn in my family, I’m super close to my mom — isn’t that how my own family would go too?

Then they unceremoniously announced that this baby was a BOY — and I was shocked. I’m embarrassed to admit it now, but I actually cried on the way out of the doctor’s office. What on Earth was I going to do with a boy?!

A phone call to a trusted boymom friend on the way home started to turn me around a bit (as did a shopping trip to the baby boys section at H&M) and I decided I’d embrace this new life path I’d been handed.  Everyone told me about the special relationship between a boy and his mama — and how fun it is to play cars and trains with them — and how low key they are as teenagers compared to girls. (Ha!) By the time my oldest was born, I was thrilled to be his mom and immediately fell in love with raising boys.

Three years later I was pregnant again — another boy, yay! Brothers! This time I was pumped. Nothing cuter than two tiny brothers running around the house. I didn’t have to buy new clothes or new toys. Our house was prepared for boys and I loved it.

And then we decided to get pregnant again — most likely for the last time. We weren’t trying for a girl, but I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t holding out hope that this might be the daughter I’d always hoped for. But, it wasn’t to be. Ultrasound: BOY.

It took me a couple hours to really wrap my mind around the fact of only ever having boys, but I came around pretty quick. I’d had two miscarriages before this baby so I was excited just to hear he was healthy. His two big brothers were ecstatic to hear another boy was joining their tribe, and honestly — by the point, I probably wouldn’t even know what to do with a girl.

Today, I LOVE being a boymom and I actually feel super lucky that this is the deal I was handed. I’ve learned that all those things I’d heard about little boys were true. (Get back to me in 10 years and I’ll let you know how the teenage thing goes.) I still have to continually remind myself that boys need to be active and play outside and run and fight and yell (all unfamiliar things to me, still!) but I’m getting better at it.

And as my boys have gotten older, I’ve met so many other boymoms all in the same surprised boat as me — raising boys and loving it. I even created an Instagram account called @boymoms_unite where I post ideas to help other moms (and myself) connect with their boys and tackle issues like video games, potty talk and LEGO storage.

When I pictured my motherhood, I never thought it would look like this — but I’m so, so glad I was wrong.

This post was written by Lyndsey Wells. You can find her on Instagram @boymoms_unite where she shares all about her experiences raising three little boys.

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    At Motherhood Revival, the goal is to build community through storytelling. My name is Morgan Gifford and each week, I sit down with influential mamas to record the amazing experiences that shaped their motherhood. You will also be able to find stories posted to the blog. Through these stories I aim to reach others who need to feel uplifted and inspired. I hope you’ll follow along!

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